hohohohohohohohohhohhoohoohohohohohhohhohoo. today's sunday which means that tomorrow's school again! ~.~ seriously, i need to put aside some time for myself to be alone. but i can't seem to have any time available at all! \:

speaking of no time, i was reminded about one of esteemortal message which reads; "welcome to the sec 3 life where we have no life." i totally agreed on that sentence. now i feel that i have no life at all, it's like my life's revolving school, home, school, home, school, home.

i seem to have neglected so much things. from family to friends to even, myself. the only time where i can really interact with my family is during the weekends because i tend to be home only around 7-8pm per weekdays. and by the time then, my dad has left for work.

despite spending my school hours with my friends, i feel that i somehow neglected them. and i think i am very guilty of that. all these committments in school caused me and some friends to somehow drift apart and i'm kinda sad over it.

i feel that i really need some time for myself to sit down and self reflect, so that i can be a much better person tomorrow than who i am today, isn't it? but everything that's happening in my life's preventing me from doing so.

i guess all these problems just boils down to me, it's my fault. so i'm sorry to anybody that i've neglected. i'll try my best from now on to make some time out for each of you. but for now, i really need a breather.

miss lam talked to me yesterday, with regards to my 2 ccas and council. she told me how much stress i would face for next year(or even this year) because i'm also a higher mother tongue student as well. she advises me to quit one of my committments so that i'll be more relaxed and at least do much better for gce 'o' levels this year/next year.

it's obvious that i can't quit npcc cause it's like my first cca and it's a core cca. i tried quitting during sec 1 and miss si was persistent about her stand, let alone now. -.-

i can't bear to quit guitar, besides the promise that i've given to the graduated seniors, there's just this strong bond i have towards guitar members and my passion for guitar has just been increasing daily. guitar ensemble gives me a totally different feeling from npcc.

and also, i can't possibly quit council cause i've rejected mr sim twice and after he persuaded me like 2 years, then i agreed. i don't think it would be nice if i break the promise i gave, isn't it?

what should i do now? \:
quit guitar/council, or quit neither?

*looks at this about 30 minutes later* o.o okay, i guess i was feeling pretty blue just now. but today's fine with the usual routine. church, tm, home. and oh yes, xiuwen has just changed her phone, now all of them are sony ericsson except for mine! ):

but i'm gonna change soon tooooo!~ :D preferably to W380i or W760i. (: but i don't have the money. $_$ kinda broke these days, talking about that. i realised i owe people a lot of things! x.x sorry guys!

oh yes, i'm one of the people to be in the speech day npcc guard-of-honour contingent. :S how cool is that. 8) and plus plus plus, i'm involved for guitar too, i love songs for guitar's performance during speech day too on the 26th july. can't wait! ^^v

okay, off to another hectic week. shall post next weekend, hopefully! [:

一个人怎么会变得那么多？
i don't understand .

♥Sunday, June 29, 2008